User Profile

I decided to make a LiveJournal after reading an article about the Internet and how one's presence in the Cyber community is scrutinized in the light of any recognition of that individual for whatever reason. I want people to be able to look back and see what I am about, who I am, and where I come from. I want to leave my mark on the world, no matter how big or small, and it is my small hope that something I have to say will influence or affect that reader in some way. I have always found great comfort in reading other's life experiences, especially when I find something that I myself can relate to, and some of my favorite songs are favorites because their lyrics speak to me on a personal level. So who am I? I'm the embodiment of both an Aquarius and a Pisces, my birthday falling very close to a Pisces although technically I am categorized as an Aquarius. I am currently struggling to find my place in this world, knowing what I hope to accomplish but not the means by which to get there. I want to inspire and help others. I want to be that compassionate shoulder another leans on in their time of need. I feel that after graduating and getting out of a long-term relationship last year, I've lost my ability to feel true emotion..and I want it back. I think crying leads to refreshing peacefulness. I think laughing is a cure to even the worst heartbreak, if only for a brief moment. I believe only my real friends truly know and understand me, and even then, it is only what I allow them to see. I am a private person, too self-conscious and guarded for my own good. I am afraid to be hurt again, and worried that people would not understand the real me if I gave too much of myself away too early to someone. Some people have accused me of being naive. I don't like that word though, and choose to express myself as optimistic, not naive. I know what is out there, I know the world is a scary, dangerous place, but I also am reminded everyday of the overarching humanity, generosity, and good will of the majority of people in this world, and that is what I choose to focus on. I absolutely love my family and friends, and would truly be lost in this big world without them, but I also have a restless need to assert my independence and prove to everyone, especially myself, that I can survive on my own. The most at peace I ever felt was living in Washington, DC two summers ago, and I want that feeling back more than anything.

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